Quotes

From NeoWiki

This is a page dedicated to the memory of hilarious quotations. may they rest in peace on NeoWiki.

Contents

[edit] 2004

August 16, 2004

21:08 <@SteveB> i just realized that the girl i've been hitting on for the past 3 days is a senior
21:08 <@SteveB> lol
21:08 < andy> hah
21:08 < andy> whenever you see a girl you should just walk up to her and say "asl"
21:08 < andy> then youll know

[edit] 2007

November 11, 2007

13:47 <+lindsay> i think wikipedia is better than my online textbook :(

[edit] 2008

March 19, 2008

<dave> alice: HOW DO YOU LIKE BEING A WHORE? 
<alice> dave: I have never known another existence. Do you like being a human?

March 30, 2008

22:01 <+Dirty_Dave> some giirl just asked me if i was canadian and said fuck no im no trash can head....turns out shes canadian
22:02 <+Dirty_Dave> whoopsies

June 23, 2008

01:07 < sargas> DimaV: stand back, I know regex
<stiv2k> I think I can take credit for most of the code ;)
<sargas> i take credit for 80% of the bugs
<stiv2k> lol
<DimaV> i take credit for 100% of the yelling

June 27, 2008

15:21 < linolium> vitk: life is a bitch, and then you die
15:22 < vitk> linolium: life is like asshair: short, rough and full of shit.
15:22 < linolium> aww, that's gross
15:22 < vitk> but true!
15:22 < linolium> yes, you're right
15:22 <@DimaV> vitk, u know ur ass hair are connected to your tear ducts
15:23 <@DimaV> by a nerve
15:23 < vitk> DimaV: O_o
15:23 <@DimaV> some things you learn in human bio
15:23 <@DimaV> vitk, go ahead, pull one out and try not to cry a lil
15:23 <@DimaV> ;)

June 30, 2008

15:53 < echoline> this channel is off the hook today
15:53 < echoline> this is like a
15:53 < sahal> godsend
15:54 <&linolium> bonfire
15:54 < echoline> housecat
15:54 <@DimaV> mother
15:54 <&linolium> lol.
15:54 <@DimaV> nouns
15:56 <&linolium> htns in real life would probably be some shy korean kid or something
16:23 <&linolium> don't steal the last 4 digits of my credit card
16:24 <@DimaV> September 11 Security Fee I 2.54
16:24 <&linolium> yeah...
16:24 < sahal> lol
16:24 <@DimaV> hah
16:24 <@DimaV> linolium, well it's the cheapest u'd have to pay for someone to touch you innapropriately
16:24 < shariq> LOL
16:25 < vitk> DimaV: rofl
16:25 <&linolium> DimaV: I have that effect on people :-/
16:25 < vitk> DimaV: that deserves to be put onto wikiquote!

July 18, 2008

<echoline> guys
<echoline> about chicago
<echoline> turn the sun down

August 16, 2008

<DimaV> .
<boku> ,
<DimaV> by our powers combined....
<DimaV> WE
<DimaV> ARE
<DimaV> ;

October 14, 2008

<stiv2k> what's the deal?
<DimaV> with
<boku> airline peanuts?
13:05	rickb	If police have to go through in between 4 and 16 weeks of gun training before they are allowed to carry one on duty, 
citizens need training as well. That is my arguement, and it is to say the least, bullet proof.
13:05	rickb	:p
13:05	rickb	that was so corny
13:39	sahal`	they're going to use some kind of alcohol based ice melter this year
13:39	dirty_d	what a waste
13:39	sahal`	it's made out of left over vodka
13:39	sahal`	or something
13:39	rickb	Then you will have a bunch of hobo's drinking the sewer water.
13:39	dirty_d	theres no such thing as leftover vodka
13:39	sahal`	LOL
13:40	rickb	dirty_d: Correct.
13:40	rickb	dirty_d: Only vodka you forgot about.
13:46	rickb	sahal`: But! Criminal stats would agree with me, the people that are molestors in politics are MOSTLY republicans.
13:46	echoline	rickb: true
13:46	echoline	rickb: they want to seem conservative
13:46	rickb	echoline: It use to be the thing to do, be a conservative.
13:46	echoline	rickb: but behind closed doors that's about as liberal as it gets
20:48 < eric> fucking antitrust, movie is supposed to be like 2hrs, it's been 
              on all night
20:48 < eric> with COMMERCIALS
20:48 < sargas> eric: rofl
20:48 < sargas> eric: just watch it online?
20:48 < eric> it was convenient because it was on tv
20:49 < sahal> lol
20:49 < eric> minus the co. n. st. a. nt pa- u -s --e -s every 12 fucking 
              seconds for commercials
20:49  * sargas thins "co. n. st. a. nt pa- u -s --e -s" might be valid in some 
          language
20:50 < sahal> eric... how did you do that?
20:50 < eric> manually
20:50 < eric> carefully

October 20, 2008

01:40 < DimaV> what happen
01:40 < DimaV> someone set us up the bomb?
01:40 < rickb> DimaV: I rebooted me server, we are safe for another 15 days. :p
01:40 < DimaV> of what, flying monkeys?
01:41 < rickb> DimaV: Yes, that is a our greatest threat.
01:41 < DimaV> like bears?
01:42 < rickb> I am afraid of bears. I think owls are a waste of time.
01:43 < rickb> Bears are giant, marauding, godless killing machines.
01:45 < DimaV> and they prey on our kids on the internet

November 20, 2008

16:29 < lucy> [slashdot] Recourse For Poor Customer Service?
16:29 -!- lucy [lucy@7FB1A99.81841435.82EEA247.IP] has joined #neoturbine

December 01, 2008

20:00 Stars I just woke up 
20:00 Stars after masturbating furiously and taking a nap 
20:00 sahal` good moring 
20:00 eric wow, well then 
20:00 eric good night 
20:00 sahal` lol 
20:00 sahal` did you use both hands? 
20:01 sahal` and sand paper? 
20:01 Stars no and no 
20:01 Stars I guess I am not an EXPERT MASTER BATER then :( 
20:03 sahal` i guess not 

December 15, 2008

18:36 < htns2> eric, everytime obama fucks up, I'm going to rag on you for the next four years
18:36 < htns2> just to let you know
18:36 < eric> htns2: cool
18:36 < eric> htns2: everytime i get annoyed, im going to /kill you, just to let you know
18:36 -!- htns2 [htns@IP-B5858D37.lightspeed.austtx.sbcglobal.net] has quit [Killed (eric (like now))

December 22, 2008

12:18 < eric> shes got the most unorganized cd collection ever wtf
12:18 < eric> she has like 34 stacks
12:18 < eric> and im supposed to know which i ripped
12:19 < sahal> 34 stacks?!
12:19 < sahal> just laying around?
12:19 < eric> shes pulling them out of this gigantic ass cabinet
12:20 < eric> where they're sorted by...... what she last listened to
12:20 < sahal> that's awesome
12:20 < eric> ive never seen so much legitimately purchased music in my life

[edit] 2009

January 20, 2009

11:31	fry	i gave a girl linux once, she thought she had a virus...
11:31	fry	luckily, i was able to explain that it was not BSD

February 5, 2009

<Master_Tr4vluk3> damnit
<Master_Tr4vluk3> i shaved off my beard
<Master_Tr4vluk3> and i miss it
<Master_Tr4vluk3> wtf am i supposed to stroke while im thinking, my cock?

February 15, 2009

08:02 -!- alice [alice@C0D4FB80.F7618075.2B6683C6.IP] has joined #neoturbine
08:10 < lucy> [digg] Eighty computers missing from nuke lab
08:10 < alice> lucy: Ask me another question.
08:10 < lucy> alice: Reply hazy, try again.
08:10 < alice> lucy: Oh, you are a poet.
08:10 < lucy> alice: Yeah that's right. Not really, but I can recite poetry.


April 7, 2009

<Metal_Master_Tr4vluk3> i think im drunk, i tried making a screwdriver and like, i poured the vodka in, and drank it without putting orange juice in on accident
<Metal_Master_Tr4vluk3> i was wondering why it looked so clear

May 8, 2009

13:01 < lindsay> i have to pee so bad
13:01 < eric> all that champagne
13:02 < lindsay> lucky i didnt wet the bed
13:02 < eric> if you came in IRC first thing this morning and had said "guys.. 
              i wet the bed last night", i would still be making fun of you :[
13:03 < lindsay> its happened before
13:03 < lindsay> i wet the bed when i was sleeping w/ my bf before
13:03 < eric> was he pissed
13:03 < eric> err
13:03 < lindsay> LITERALLY
13:03 < eric> no pun intended
13:03 < lindsay> LOL
13:03 < lindsay> no he thought it was cute
13:03 < lindsay> :D

July 26, 2009

12:34 < echoline> i dont have top ramen
12:34 < eric> get some
12:34 < echoline> i dont have a pot
12:34 < lucy> echoline: Do you know anyone who has pot.
12:34 < echoline> lucy: why, are you looking?

July 31, 2009

<AfroPanda> what can #neoturbine do for me
<Stars> we can idle on an ENTERPRISE level

August 13, 2009 Our lovely bots.

14:25 < alice> lucy: Also, silverburst is god of the new world
14:25 < lucy> alice: , is is god of the new world? Also, gr, why are wifi drivers packaged with like

[edit] 2010

February 15, 2010

23:30 < @Metal_Master_Tr4vluk3> ya, whenever i get high                   
23:30 < @Metal_Master_Tr4vluk3> i start understanding italian       


April 23, 2010

21:26 < Ian> rickb: if you force sex on a prostitute, is it rape,     Stars
             or is it shoplifting?                                    
21:26 <&rickb> Ian: ROFL
21:27 < Ian> serious question
21:27 < Ian> cuz like
21:27 < Ian> rape is a felony
21:27 < Ian> and shoplifting is like, only a misdemeaner or
             something